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Simple girl with not-so-simple thinking.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

BACHAO! Its my Self Defense Weapon!!

My lunch gang was spurting out food morsels while I cracked my concocted jokes on self defense. Basically, my funda was, Choose your self defense wisely. The discussion had started cause lunch-partner-1 said she was checking out the Pepper Spray which cost a bomb. The lunch-partner-2 was just gaping at the discussion. While, I described a scenario where the self defense weapon was a small knife. The knife was conveniently overpowered by the hooligan and used against the victim!

I declared, hands down, my weapon would be my nails and knee.

Well, firstly, no one can overpower those and take them away!
Secondly, I 'think' you can do ENOUGH damage with these.

Of course, this is a much more serious matter when it comes to reality. It takes alertness, care, precaution and perhaps a lot more. We hear and read every now and then girls being attacked by morons who usually target them because they're the weaker sex. That makes me wish sometimes that we could be the stronger, the taller and the mightier sex, so we could do some irreparable serious damage to those morons. X|

While learning Kalaripayattu, I learned from my teacher that the integral part of self defense is first, alertness (which comes with practice and focus) and secondly, a sound mind.
The sound mind is what will tell you the best option that you should pick at that split second. Many people misunderstand that self defense always means landing two flip kicks on the Bad-Guy. No. Self Defense means protecting yourSELF.
This may many a times mean, being wise, ducking the mugger and making a smart escape from the trouble scene! You're not proving to be a Hero by sticking around and getting few of your limbs mashed.

Especially for girls, who will rarely be able to fight back and overpower, things to REMEMBER:
1. You are EQUIPPED. Use your nails, teeth, feet. Kick and scratch like-never-before.
2. Scream! Gather as much as attention as possible.
3. Remember, the person infront of you is human too. He WILL feel pain. Target the wise areas, you know!
4. Nose, Eyes, Ears, Throat. Remember, Serious damage to be done.

So as I sip on my bed-time-tea, I looked up more stuff on Self Defense.
I came across this hilarious video which I would recommend all of you to watch.

Cheers Girls, go kick some butt!

Wednesday, June 24, 2009


The smallest words in the print ad.
The fastest spoken words in any advertisement on radio.
The part that is mostly faded away in between transition of two scenes.
That's the **Conditions Apply Statement. You will never hear it, see it or know it. That's how you should recognize it.

I saw this irritating-wonderful-cheap-yet-magnetic tactic in the U.K. and now here as well.
The price tag said, 2 POUNDS! I galloped to that aisle and grabbed my loot. Smirked to myself at my catch. Marched to the cash counter and patted my back in my thoughts. Until, the billing machine beeped 20!! Placing my eye-balls back into their sockets, I grabbed that outfit back from the cashier and gaped at the price-tag. It said, 2 POUNDS!! (off). And in the minutest font I have ever seen was printed...20 Pounds.

That moment on. I stopped believing in offers. Although, I have always been the suspicious sorts. The ones, who never believe in offers, discounts, sales, Buy N Get N etc. I get lured to them anyway. (Remember, I am a girl! :) )
I am sure we all come across this tactic almost EVERY single day in every shop. We run to check it out, we buy the stuff, we crack the code and we think to ourselves, "Who's smart now?"

Now come on, whom are we kidding?
Why would a business man give you things for free! There's gotta be something in it for him. Unless, he's the reincarnation of Danveer Karna

So, I have decided. (From now on, I will not go for such offers.
That's what you may THINK I would say. But, no. :) )

I will go these so-called-sales. Obviously.
I will also run to the aisles with the loudest colorful fonts.
I will grab my kitty from all the cheapest bargains as WELL.
But, I will be much more patient when I abuse the store for how they cheated me into buying all that.

**Dying to see this movie! :D

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Tough times call for Rough jokes..

Just do a Google on that word and see the VARIOUS links and explanations that show up. Its mind boggling.
That just shows, How, for every person its a different definition altogether.
Somehow, I just feel that sometimes this whole recession thing is just twisted to suit our own version.

The tailor proudly says, its recession, so people are coming to him, as they can't afford branded stuff.
The petrol bunk guy says, its horrible, people are car-pooling and saving becoz of the recession!
The maid says, its recession, so she needs more payment. :\ ( I did ask why, she says cause all the prices are now going up. I still couldn't put the two pieces together).
The investment adviser says, its recession, don't invest in mutual funds. Rather go for insurance schemes. ( I thought its the right time to invest. Becoz the market WILL go UP. Right? Right? )
Boy! The EGGS are more expensive. Now I gotta think before I crack that shell every morning for breakfast. How'd that happen?! They say, its a long story all the way from the hen's feed to the poultry to the truck that carries eggs... to the petrol that drives the truck etc. etc.

And while I ponder, I come across this email forward;

Subject: Economic Slowdown....It was a Hard decision

On the impulse, I smiled to myself. Silly humor.

Then, it hit me somewhere, thinking about the same in our context. Obviously not that we'd sunny-side-up our kids. But, the fact that a such natural & crucial phase of life is now decided by an economic slowdown. Something that my parents always told me was God's blessing only, is now a Financial Checkpoint. Silly, but true. :)

Monday, June 15, 2009

The Vada Pav Weather..

I remember when I was visiting my sister in U.K. for the short and sweet duration of eight days; I couldn't help but beg for spicy food in that cold misty weather.

Its something about the rains and the mist that makes your palette beg for the Indian Spices. My theory of Glutton is, you need that hot spice to keep you warm in the cold. :)

True or not, its the most practiced ritual in India. The most common dialogue on the advent of rains, "Chai and Pakodey ho jaaye (Let's gobble Tea and Pakode). Wherein, majority of the fellow Indians are referring to the droolicious Onion Pakodas.

The heavenly cousin of this rain-time snack is the Vada Pav. Infamous for the sinful indulgence all the way from Pune, Mumbai.

Lately, Vada Pav have been making flashes in front of my eyes in many forms. I went to the cafeteria after the gruesome workout in the Aerobics class. There they were. Stacked up all pretty on the counter with those fried green chillies and the copyright green chutney. (Is this fair? :| )

Will power prevailed and I got back at my desk. An old edition of newspaper loiters in front my eyes (a coincidence...) speaking about how India's famous delicacies are world famous and making people weak in the knees. On top of the list, there was a glorified picture of, You KNOW WHAT!

I mean, what has a girl gotta do to resist the temptation.

Now, its raining. I haven't had a work out. Still, I am hungry and all I can see is the following images dancing in front of my pupils;

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Catching up on Ketchup

I have heard of people eating all sorts of things with Ketchup.
They love Ketchup. They can't do without it. They even have Facebook communities to prove their die-hard love for it.

I like Ketchup, more lovingly known as Tomato Sauce here.
Although I will have to be sedated and fed in order to have combination like ice cream with ketchup etc. Nevertheless, I do prefer to make my fries swim in the pool of ketchup.

There are these debates on which Ketchup brand is the best. People would seriously come down to fight in the ally to make their brand win, or at least that's how serious they sound about discussing this topic.

To me, as long as it tastes like Ketchup. It will do. :)
And this DOES NOT include that weird orange-jam-paste-semi-solid-fly-clad sauce which our cafeteria used to offer. That is plain obnoxious.
I do have a liking for Maggi, Hot and Sweet Tomato Chilli sauce, cause, It's Different!

I remember how I would love to toy around with Ketchup as a kid. Mom would make Upma (also known as; Rava, Khara Bhath, Suji) and it would be playtime. I would make an Igloo, a train, a hut or even a stick figure. Dot the eyes, windows, wheels with Ketchup. Used to be good fun to eat it an hour later, not for poor Mom though.

Now, I have to act grown up. So obviously I cannot play with food. So, I just limit myself to doodling with remnants of Ketchup on plate. It sure is fun :D Try it some day. Few samples to start off with;

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

First time always hurts.. real bad.

ANYTHING. An emotion, an act or a routine. First time, is what you will always remember.

Today, I lost my phone. Just like that. I had it one moment and before I realized, it was gone. It didn't hurt because it was expensive or it was my favorite color. It hurt because I would save all these messages on it which meant a lot to me.
Maybe now, they would make some sense to someone who will read them as well.

I remember when my sister first lost her phone. It was Dad's gift to her.
She called me up from the phone booth, weeping. I laughed at her childish behavior. Now, I know it was mean to do so.

As Prasad said, its like losing a friend. A close one. Although he's lost it many times now, I guess you do feel bad every time it happens. Sometimes, its just the hassle of putting together all the phone numbers that gets you low. He felt really miserable when he lost his phone for the first time. I guess after that he just felt worse because I felt bad for him as well. So, then I decided that I won't feel bad about it. After all, nothing is bigger than the smile of a person you love.

Being an organized person hits you all the more in a situation like this. You cant come to terms with something as simple as a case of lost key/phone/wallet. But then, now as I write, I realize that these are the things we take for granted the most. Like our loved ones, we adore them, we value them, we see them every day; but we DO eventually grow used to them. Just that we realize their impact in our lives only when they are not around us.

I will surely miss my turquoise colored Nokia. Hope it got more useful to someone than it did to me.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Playing HARD on the HAIR!?

This is one topic I did lot of survey on.
I moved in to Bangalore around eight years ago. Since then I've "progressively" gotten BALD. I know that would be an exaggeration to the current state, but lets face it buddies my head shines now.

Not only is it heart shattering but rather EMBARRASSING when lock of hair just comes in your hand while stroking it (pssst...that's a different tale of how you try to sneak them away in a miniature roll!)

There it was, Sherlock on duty.

I asked my lunch gang about it, my mom, dad, my friends, Prasad. EVERYONE agreed, I knew it, it had to be, H20.

I would NEVER given in to fiction and myths being the Miss. Practically-prove-it-to-me. So I Googled. So, there WERE people like me who complained of hair loss ever since they got to Bangalore, infact to South India.

Victims: Age group 20-30.

Residents? : Mostly people moved in to South India lately.

Symptoms: Hair comes into your hand more swiftly than sweat being wiped off your forehead. Some complained of itch and irritation on scalp as well.

Throw-off-the-track clues: Many people said they grew up all their lives using hard water. So, that couldn't be the reason. It has got to be the bad diet/stress/lack of proteins/hormones - chemical locha (as said Munnabhai).

This suspect was getting more interesting by the minute.

I knew for a fact that the water coming in our house was Hard. AS A ROCK. Funny to sound, not-too-good to taste. When I checked with other victims, they agreed to this hardness as well!

Now Sherlock jotted down all points together.
1. I could proudly say, I had a balanced diet.
2. Stress? : Facebook quiz said I just have 22% stress ;) . But jokes apart, I think I am pretty well-balanced-stressed.
3. I sleep well over 7 hours.
4. No chemical locha's (known to me as of now :) )

Thus, EUREKA: It HAD to be the hard water. A study said that the excessive minerals in the hard H20 tend to deposit on scalp over longer durations, sometimes causing irritation and dryness. Over due course of time, this also causes hair loss. Plus, a BIG factor that may add to it is using hot/luke warm water on hair.
As any other disease/pain/sickness/allergy, this is not applicable to EVERYONE, but to MOST.

Now, as they say, agreeing on a problem is not the solution, its just the first step. So the solution?

1. Everyday eat 15 soya beans soaked overnight.
2. ALWAYS use cold water on hair. Not even luke warm.
3. Boil the water previous night when you intend to wash your hair. This will cause sedimentation and use this cleaner/softer water on your hair the next day.

Of course, you need follow other disciplinary acts like, good sleep, proper food, putting end to torturing your hair with straightening, coloring, perming, dying etc., over-use of oil (Trust me, you just need to enhance circulation in scalp, do that with your fingers moving in circular motion. The whole oil business is overrated).

So all the best! Cherish those lovely locks!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

The Blue BAR Lady...

TAKE FIVE. That's the place I visited this weekend.
Its a bar-restaurant-hang out joint on 100 Ft. Road, Indiranagar, right above coffee day.

First thing you CAN'T miss noticing is the CROWD. Jesus! Whole of Bangalore is out here, if not on the roads causing traffic. And yes, I became one of them :)
We got a seat immediately and bumped into not just one pair of friends, but two! (Psst...See, told ya, B'lore is here)

Its pretty much dark in there. People sit, drink and drink. Yeah, that's not a typo. There WAS nothing to EAT except appetizers. I was starving and my brain was already caught up in mirages of burgers and kababs. Being a non-drinker didn't help keep me occupied either.

I swear I could have eaten the beautiful glasses hanging on the bar but at that moment Prasad got down to distracting me. He's always so good at that. He asked me to go click pictures around. Sounds funny, at least it did to me. How can I go and click pictures while people sit and chat around me!?

Despite my hundred cries, I was pushed out of my cozy sofa-niche by him and left stranded in the ocean of people . :S

I walked down to the bar. Two men stood there whipping out the cocktails and mocktails. The drinks looked simply "B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L". Decorated by amusing Stirrers, delicate garnishes and colorful liquids.

The Bartenders were swiftly bringing out these yummy concoctions and lining them up on the bar. My camera swung into action. Sharing some of them for you as well. Don't miss the Blue-Bar-Lady pic, I christened this name for her cause it caught my eye.

Then we got down to our usual mindless fun. Prasad does his "expressions" while I give him the "moods" and he spins out these hilarious faces. He almost reminds me of Jim Carrey. Adarsh, Prasad's (and now mine as well) good friend was also engulfed into this circus.

I had just tormented them enough when I was captivated by the overpowering smell of Chicken. My Chicken Momos had arrived!! :D

To end it, I must say, if not for the drinks and a fun time, you should go to this place for their Chicken Momos. Outta-the-world I SAY!

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Who said Beauty Lies Within? ;)

I almost flung my phone away as mom screamed, " AGAIN BEAUTY PARLOR?? Din't you just go last weekend??"
Now see, this is the problem. You can never make a person understand the nitty-grities of beauty parlor who has never been to one. Simple rule (for me), you never spend a bomb in one go. That will just make you feel guilty!
You go in successive sessions, spend a little here and tiny thing there. TA-DA! Behold, the beauty arrives. :)

This has been an age old discussion in our house, Myself being the pioneer in parlor-going-culture. I even dragged my elder sister to it after seeing her disinterest in self-keeping. Now, proud to say, she's hooked to it too.

Mom never went to one, you see she's the naturally pretty types. Moms always are I think. My grandmothers never went either. So that makes me the modern brat of the clan. But, I have points in my defense.

I always admire women who take care of themselves. This DOES NOT mean burning a hole in your purse every time you step out. It means, they are conscious of how they carry themselves. They deserve to be. After all needless to say, women have always been the epitome of B-E-A-U-T-Y.

The very fact that I think on these lines is shown in my picture I clicked quite a while ago...

(More of my pictures at: http://flickr.com/photos/deeptikharbanda)

So how do a few trips to the parlor hamper with your pretty-ness?

Still, my Dad sticks to the phrase, "Beauty lies within".
I agree!
And thats why I say, "Beauty lies within, so why hide it under bushy eyebrows and a moustache?" :)